SHIKHA


She stepped out of the shower. Her hair was wrapped in a blue towel; water droplets barely contained trickled down her neck and on to her bare shoulders. She scrutinized her body which had changed considerably since the last time her sister called her ?scrawny?. But, that was six months ago. Now, Shikha realized with a pang, she had again outgrown her lacy bra for the 2nd time. Which meant she?d have to buy a larger size and soon.

Shikha was the thin, quiet one of the two sisters. Neha was the vivacious child who went against all norms of their conservative upbringing. Neha was the one with the love letters from the boys in their school. Neha was the one who got the bluff calls and the flowers on Valentine's day. As for Shikha, she felt like a mere shadow in front of her lovely younger sister. Their mother always remarked how Shikha's big brown eyes did not quite fit into her small, narrow face. Her voluptuous lips often caused surprised looks from strangers. Their sanu ma would lament, if only they could fatten up her cheeks, she would be beautiful. Shikha had long before been de-sensitized to comments about her features and her thin body. She had learned not to care. But, she had also learned to fantasize about an ample body and a perfect boyfriend. Shikha was a dreamer. She was, an escapist who skillfully balanced her imperfect world with a perfect fantasy.

Neha, Shikha's younger sister was getting married in two months. To her mother's amazement, Neha had agreed to marry Binod, their father's friend's son, a family friend. Her family had expectations of Neha, to do the outrageous: to elope or to marry a Kuhire. It was, the family's way of bracing for impending disaster given Neha's track record of having dated beyond the acceptable Nepali caste, and color line. Shikha remembered an overjoyed mother rushing to the ?Hare Krishna? temple to offer prayers of gratitude, donations and flowers at the thought of Neha settling down with a ?good? huney khaney, Nepali boy. And, to one the whole family approved of.

As Shikha struggled into her jeans, she smiled secretively. Her time would come, soon, very soon. The email she had received from Jeevan assured her of that.


**********to be continued**********

correction: are vocal readers ni**

Ouch! That hurt. Hahaha. You wish. ;)

You try to hard chitara babe. That was mere reference of your sharp tongue which was rather subtly brutal. But anyways, thanks for making an 'effort'. Rest assured, next tyam that happens I would know that you are actually trying hard to ignore. LOL ;)

Hmmmm... Confused is no longer vocal reader. Aba timro gupchup vocal bhe malai tha bhena hai. Confused dude, we all know ur watching. Yeso clear garnu paro kuroo. :)

"But, Indi... thanks for taking the time to read long story despite your discomforts. "
---> Now are ya serious? LOL. Hahahahhaa. You indeed are as mysterious as batgirl. ;).

---IndisGuise:)

Indi Bro,

Have no intention to join in your 'jerking' game. Just came to ask you not toss my good name with your comrade-in-arms jerk.

While I am here, let me tell you that I like to stay away from 'Confused'- whom you have been referring frequently and gleefully- for his/her cheap sexual connotations in every remarks to the extent of harassment, fragility of a person at the verge of insanity, shameless display of sexual frustrations, cynicism and indecency. Keep that in mind, hai ?

When I have said this much, let me also be honest with you and dare to share that I also find you sharing Confused's profile to some extent. As a matter of fact, at one point I thought Confused and you are the same person. I don't remember if I have already said this to you.

Knowing your fragility, you might have offended very much to hear all this. But I had to let you know this, for my own selfish good- to protect my good name from being a toy in someone's cheap jerking game.

You asked for it. You got it.

Have a good day !

Nepe dai,
First and foremost, let me apologize for unsolicited use of your name for the 'jerking' game.

I had no idea whatsoever you would be disgusted, so to speak; to be mentioned in a same breath as Confused. I however do not interpret his character in the same manner as you so self-righteously portrayed. Everyone has their good, and inevitably, bad points: dare I say, you, and me included.

That said, let me move on to your honest and/or quite possibly flawed (I am entitled to my opinion, am I not?) assumption; which at best, could have fostered from your selective reading. Rest assured, please throw away any shred of doubt you have, regarding me vis-a-vis confused, being the same person.

And NO, you have NOT said that to me until NOW.

Indeed it was meant in mirthful way, but the bitterly suppressed chewed words, although politely presented, speaks volume of how seriously you take the so called revolutionary discussions where I thought we all were exchanging views and see if we could learn a few things, and if not simply agreeing to disagree when we politick. I presume, those suppressed-for-the-time being anger, have now found a seemingly polite, and of course expectedly out-of-the-blue (for me) outlet.

Thus, me asking, albeit unknowingly ( dharo dharma la :) hehe), and you giving is, more or less, justified.

Even knowing my fragility (did this arrive out of my answer to you in the past, terming you act reacting fragilely and rather stupidly about the 'resume' posting? This IS a 'rhetorical' question.), your above statements did not offend me.

First, it made me realize my mistake.
Secondly, it made me laugh a little. (A smile would be a better word.)
And lastly, it just verified a well documented fact, how you carry minor tit bits in your heart.

Nepe dai, let me once again apologize for any genuine irreparable harm I did to your good name.
Henceforth, your reference shall be made when it is necessary and relevant, in some non-comrade-in-arms jerks.

Also, please take this with good heart, if you can; my fragility is far too strong, my conscience far too clear, to be broken and shaken, by few chillo Nepali, and largely redundant theories.
(Please note: I said largely, not entirely). Thus please take caution ( not that it matters ) while making sweeping statements.

I gracefully take what you gave me; please accept few I managed as well.

You have a great day sire :)
- IndisGuise.

Indi ji,

I accept your apology. Thank you.

But please don't try to "politicize" everything. Politics is a totally different realm. Confused's political views were much more sensible than his behaviours were.

Nepe dai,
Thanks for accepting my apology.

Also please note: the adjectives and nouns you associated with Confused and later cleverly associated me with those profile; was uncalled for, for me. Those nouns and adj. were more than far fetched, and more manipulative than sensible.

Just wanted to bring that to your notice.

Yes, we should not politicize everything. Glad to hear somthign of that effect from you.

come on Sitara post the next episode.

I thought I shall bring this to notice that, that "jerked" word was used as a metaphor. It just appeared to me that perhaps it was taken in a bad taste or it was taken on the face value and associated with the popular hush-hush terminology. What I wanted to express was, Sitara's story yanked, wrenched, and twitched something inside. I was merely applauding her brilliance to portray the character and the conclusion of the protagonist in the story.

I hope she did not take it in bad taste. As much as I know or have come to know her thru sajha, I have nothing but respect for her and enormous liking for her creativity.

Yesoooo socheko ta arkai artha lagayechan bhanera po buje maile. It was NOT, I repeat not indented to sound like a cheap sexual connotation. Honestly. Please be noticed.

Phewwwwwwww....Tyati ho :)

Confused in disguise??
Or confused is indisguise??
Me confused!

Indisguise, thank you for your kind words and your explanations. I never took it otherwise.

Hey Foe! :)